It feels good to be back in this sacred space of mine where I can escape all the woes of this world and just be me.
Where have I been? Unfortunately, nowhere cool. At home, mostly on the couch or in bed, mostly in a pain-pill coma, and mostly just really depressed.
I got my wisdom teeth out mid-July, and what was a routine surgery that went perfect turned into my own personal hell on earth in the following days. Dry socket pain is absolutely no joke. What turned into only two days off of work became a week of unpaid medical leave, which will be a whole OTHER kind of pain when I get that paycheck next week.
Since healing, I feel such an exuberance for life that can only be attained by being a bed-ridden zombie for so long. For 10 days straight, I woke up crying, telling B that I didn’t think it would ever end, and maybe I would just have to learn to live with this pain. He assured me it would get better, and it did. But I learned how desperate I can become when nothing changes after days on end – I expect change. When I’m sick with the flu or strep throat or this whole wisdom teeth debacle, I want to feel different when I wake up. And that’s really how I am about life – I know change is inevitable, therefore I expect it, I crave it, I open my doors to it always.
So much happened over this month I’ve been gone, and I will be getting to it all. But for now, I’m back, I’m not in pain, I’m almost caught up on the avalanche of backed up work from my absence, and I’m ready to rock this bitch.
Quick little shout out to my handsome husband (this pic taken last weekend in Sandpoint) – he took such great care of me, put up with so many mood swings and childish fits, brought me sustenance and medicine, dropped everything to get me a milkshake when I wanted it, and all with so much love and no resentment or annoyance. I love this man so much, it’s nauseating.